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Sunday, 29 September 2013

Today I am who I am

Some of my regular blog readers may feel that I am against some of the love and light brigade or certain spiritual groups or of those who are being the arch typical spiritual person.  

Quite to the contrary.  It is good for anyone to hold to the affirmation “today I am who I am”.

The hot bed of spiritualism is thriving amongst our communities and indeed is having their own “coming” out of the closet like a dominant gay queen stepping out in Canal Street in Manchester, loud and clear and ensuring everyone knows they are there.  Anyone who is amongst like-minded people tends to grow in confidence and feel encouraged as they recognise that there are similar people to them out there.  There is, however, like in gay society, and in every society, the catty backbiting competitive crowd who stirs up the party, and some who just follow the crowd as it is safer being on the inside than the outside.

The strong “love and light” outlook, with the odd swing of colourful garments, that marks many spiritualists is just a way of them trying to show that they are dedicated to their spiritual belief and enjoying being who they are with passion and intent, and it is the same amongst Wiccan and pagan groups.  It is normal to want to fit in, and even like the young generation in trends and fashion, the “in” crowd lead the way as to what is going to be acceptable – or not.  Natural instinct is there to protect us all and, the human as an animal, is much like any other herd animal and attempts to stay with the herd to ensure its safety, and look and act much like the rest of its brothers and sisters.  The one on the outside or looking different is the one more likely to be identified by predators lurking hungrily around the edge.

As you work with Spirit, and learn to understand how they work, you will be taken through many experiences to assist you in your knowledge and development.  Spiritualism has though, become a religion with many at the helm applying human nature to control, manage and apply rules to how modern spiritualism exists within society.   You can give a thousand points to them for being passionate and wishing Spiritualism to thrive compared to the old days when we were all drowned and hung as witches or eternally fired for being a heretic and practicing our belief – the good old days of living in the closet.   Many good things have been done to aid modern Spiritualism but a fundamental thought seems to have been somewhat forgotten.   Being spiritual is a way of being, it is not a religion. It is an unfoldment, a realisation, an epiphany, and experience all rolled into one.  Everyones’ personal journey is not totally the same, and is theirs to claim alone.  The age old human thing of trying to reinvent the wheel, where ego and insanity takes over what needs not to be a manufactured way of being with dogma and dictators influencing who you are and how you should be.

Spiritualism has grown organically from the closet days, where devoted spiritual pioneers sat in circle learning and working with spirit and allowing them to grow in their knowledge and wisdom.  With the dawning of the internet and a more accepting society, we now have big schools, workshops, churches, spiritual centres with the traditionalists and the new all trying to spread their wings and bring to the world modern spiritualism.  It is truly wonderful that we can now share our spiritual awakening and as to how we feel about it and who we are.  But with the labelling of a religion and being part of a specific society, new rules come in as to how we should behave and think and how we should practice in being “spiritual” people.  Someone somewhere originally had a great idea to do good, to further the way forward and a little group got together to influence the way – and bang everyone is on the wagon and the generalist guide “how to be spiritual” is born.  Our version of the bible has arrived in all its glory, and not a second coming messiah in sight.

Some rules are good – the Seven principles are a good standing point for anyone with a spiritual belief.  I won’t discuss these in detail as they are easily found, and appreciated by any person wishing to understand spiritualism.  But every religion has started with a seed and its flower been admired and beheld, to only be torn up by the root and put in a greenhouse and given a label as to how best it is grown and propagated.
Like any wild flower it grew well enough on its own without help.

Human history and today’s multicultural society still shows that most religions end up with humans fighting against humans whether it’s by word or by sword.  Whatever it is, it is still a sad day for mankind and spirit alike.  Is it what we truly want for our spiritual legacy?  Personally, I don’t think so, but somehow I am not sure those who are waving our banner will be listening to me.  For me it is straightforward, Spirit is always there with their blazing light of love and it’s us humans which play the hokey cokey with the dark.

It is true; there are some people out there who do need human guidance.  A spiritual awakening is a confusing place to be at times, especially if you have great Aunt Mabel or even Angel Gabriel materialising at the breakfast table for a chat unexpectedly. It’s enough for anyone to suddenly choke on their Cheerio’s.  
What we see and what we think about spirit can be overwhelming, and our minds can run around like an abandoned chicken on a motorway dancing in front of dazzling headlights.  In our need to gain knowledge, we do need to understand that there are many ways of thinking, many different experiences.  Specifically if we are going to tune into the spiritual realm and invite strange spirits for a bit of a natter because we have their loved one sitting in front of us, is not about having a duty of care and abiding by the law, but caring about a fellow human. We do need to appreciate that there is a way to deliver the fantastic news that little Jonny isn’t going to be in pain anymore and will be shortly journeying back home to the Spirit world on a one way ticket. It is not about wielding a new found power, believing that as you have an insight to someone else’s life and they have given you money to give that insight, does not mean that you have acquired the god given right to destroy or ruin it by the “truthful” words you are blessed to give from the spirit world.    Too many times I have heard how a message has been given to an unsuspecting happy client, and the next minute they are lost feeling their lives are in tatters due to a message given thoughtlessly and without care about its effects. 

Spirit is indeed loving, but there are so many mediums who are untrained, not in tune, and misinterpret their communication with Spirit. Evidence is all about having “a lovely lady with grey hair, your grandmother, who gives you her love”, rather than the real evidence of the lady you knew who sat and watched the wombles with you and fed you peanut jelly sandwiches.  If you have the privilege of having someone sitting waiting for your words and that what you are giving or feeling matters more than what the person sitting in front of you is feeling or receiving – then check you are hearing spirit.  It is likely they are jumping up and down in front of you trying to get you to hear them.

That being said, we are human and spirit sharing a journey together and as human’s we are dominated by our fears and our doubts.   It is safer to be in a group when you are first developing. There are many excellent teachers out there who are every so willing to share their experiences and wisdom for free and even more so if you wave a score note around like a red flag to a bull in the right place. It is not wrong to earn money from teaching spiritual matters, but often where money becomes the main motivation, what you get in return can lose its soul. 

The point is though....if you are working with Spirit, truly working with Spirit, you shouldn’t need to be told.  Spirit will guide you.    It is good to find out different views, and experiment with new ways of working, traditional ways and different modern spiritual thinking.  You can be angelic, Buddhist, ascended masters, seventh heaven, ghost buster or mystic meg  – it is a case of learning to be a apple, then a pear, then a banana – or just being a fruit basket like me!  It is not wrong, it is just the way you are evolving and learning.  You do not have to trash what you first thought or the knowledge you first acquired, you just have developed it and decided what is right at that time for you.  You are all that you are because of everything you have ever done, not just because of one single moment.

Sometimes I may sound somewhat cynical about some Spiritual things.   It is not that I am truly trying to put down – it is a case of every man for himself.   It is ok to follow the crowd, it is ok to wear rainbow outfits and have crystal chandeliers as earrings.....I have done it.  So do still do it occasionally.  They are so beautiful!  I do it not as a uniform, but as an expression of me.

I have a lovely knowledgable friend called Jay, who the other day came to circle wonderfully wearing beautiful orange and colourful Indian garments in celebration of Ganesha, one of her favourite Hindu deities. It was his birthday and, because she resonated with him, felt it was a way to honour him by dressing herself in colours she believed he would appreciate. Other days Jay will be just Jay, another day she will come in wearing outfits which make her resemble a little native Indian squaw.  She is not trying to be something, she is just being Jay – comfortable and enjoying being aspects of herself.

The point is that is what spiritualism is truly about, being who you are, as a spirit.  Your guides and your spirit family know you inside out.  They have known you for eternity; you do not need to be something you are not.   They will help you find who you are inside, and if you feel for a moment that you should dress like someone else, they will happily not say a word, as they want you to benefit from the experience of adopting a persona which makes you feel that you can be confident and bring out the innerspirt, the true you.  It is your human experience and for you to decide what is right for you.

You do not need me, or anyone, to criticise or to tell you are wrong in your way or thinking, or living or to tell you how to be or what to believe...and if they do, then do wonder about what it tells you about them...or even you.  If you feel it is right to be there, then that is where you should be.   It is all about synchronicity at the end of the day.  Allowing the universe to conspire to help you develop who you are, and it is all so amazing how it comes together to bring the like-minded friends, the daring of being something different than you may have been before.  You may allow them all to influence to you, wear the same outfits to fit in, be draped in crystals, use the same Tarot cards, go to all the workshops and circles to feel acceptance or part of something bigger than yourself. Even read a blog to look for insight.  It won’t always be that way, as like most people you will grow in confidence and being and enjoying who you are will become who you are.   

You may one day feel that you don’t need to know it all, don’t need to be like others, don’t need to wear a “spiritual” uniform to fit in, not needing to acquire knowledge or being part of something bigger. You will just be you in the way you want to express yourself and be comfortable in saying that.

I have found it is good to say...

”today I am who I am”.

Sunday, 25 August 2013

Just Being Human

So now you are a fully fledged medium. Your Facebook list has become the who’s who of Theso Arthur Findley Spiritual College with some of your peers now adorning a double barrelled surname of “spiritual medium”, and those mentors who you once regarded as near the lofty heights of the Great Spirit are now classed as fellow friends.  Your bookshelves that were once laced with fantasy smattered with the odd mills and boon, now look like the Mind, Body and Spirit section of Waterstones, together with an extensive unused tarot card collection.  The once uninteresting wardrobe now houses a number of rainbow outfits which would look good at a fairy convention and highlight the many colours you are.  Now, when the odd spirit pops in uninvited when you are watching corrie because they are worried about little Joey who has fallen out with dad or Burt who is dancing on the edge of the spirit world, it is just a mediums way of life.  But now you have acquired the status and the notoriety, is it all it is cracked up to be?

As a developing medium, and I will always call myself a developing medium however long I am working with spirit, you will have times when you have to put down your crystal ball and just live your life and be the human you are.  All is not always well living in the shadows of the realm of forever and even knowing that you have spirit and your belief to support you does not make you suddenly immune to living life.

The last year for me has been one of those years. A lot of starting and not finishing with a lot of where life has become so physical that much of my spiritual work has been put on hold.  I have just had to be.    Even finding time to write my blog has been lost as the big hobnailed size nine boots of life stomp through my world.  So I have lived life day by day, but, like bubbles in a shaken champagne bottle, I have had little bits of the writing monster burst from me and splash over my facebook page as a reminder that, like spirit, the soul inside is still there waiting.

So I still write little things when the urge takes me.  My husband has learnt to recognise that I may suddenly become a bit quiet and, then as he wanders on to Facebook, he sees something rather wordy appear in my status as explanation for me being awol.

Recently a lovely medium friend, who is perhaps wiser than me, recommended to me to put my name at the end of my wordy posts on facebook. Not wanting to disagree with a clever friend, I did it a few times even surrounding it with a couple of pretty stars to justify why it was there.  It just didn’t feel right however much I wrote it or embellished it.  I wondered for a moment whether it was because I felt that there was something lacking in me or that I was ashamed of my words or that I didn’t want to own what I wrote.

When it came to it, it was simply one thing.  I wasn’t intending to post my work to the world in order to be a Guru, or to be some sage that has the answers to the universe and everything to a waiting audience.  I was posting because I was human and that I was also recognising that I was surrounded by other people who were just like me, and equally just as human, and trying to live their lives in the best way they could in many human ways.  It goes without saying that the last year has provided its emotional challenges. It has been hard for me and as my thoughts about it came to the surface, I was just writing it down because it was me just trying to exist through the mayhem of it all.

I have always written, so it is a natural expression for me but even some of the statuses I have put up have still made me look in amazement at them.  I know some of it is me, but I also know my friends in the spirit world are always with me, and maybe having the odd dabble at writing too.  The Spirit world is perhaps trying to upgrade their publicity department with modern ways of contacting the physical world -  facebook and twitter is the new Daily Spirit Times.

So I don’t feel the need to put my name to everything I write. If people on Facebook want to copy what I write, they will, whether my name is against it or not. Whether they wish to give the credit and thanks to me for my words or pass it off as their own, it is always still in their choice when they post it.  If they don’t, what does it matter? If something reaches out through them and others benefit then that is a good thing. If they resonated with my words, then surely those words are, in essence, their own too? Truth always lives inside the heart and the conscious mind can often be the last to find out an open secret.  Whichever way my words get out to the universe Spirit knows where they came from and, if indeed I am to be rewarded for my moments of humanity, it will come from somewhere.  It is not important.

Facebook is, however, a wonderful place to observe how people are living their lives. I have said many times that there are many of God’s PR agents writing their own version of war and peace.  There is so much out there telling you how you should or could live your life.  There are wonderful people like Eckhart Toll and Abraham Hicks, and every day you come across people posting somebody’s wisdom on facebook, either in a picture or in a verse. Plagiarism is alive and living on Facebook - let’s not tell the lawyers!  That being said, sometimes the energy of god, the universe, Great Spirit, the goddess or whoever steps out and touches you with a one liner of truth and you feel a profound connection to something so big that you know that something indefinable has occurred within you.  An epiphany which rocks your world, and from that moment you know you feel and think different.

However it comes, I am sure after all this spiritual growth that you can look back and see your journey and that you were one person once and you now fundamentally feel different now.  You, during your development, have been graduating from the school of life.  Now when you look at others you know and see the differences between you, and your connection to the Spirit World has added so much more to you, and it is who you are today. Whilst the innocent and ignorant remained sleeping, you woke and danced in the Garden of Eden and ate the forbidden fruit from the tree of knowledge. What is known cannot be unknown and you are now running hooky from human life along the edge of the earth.  You have vaulted from being mere human to spiritual being. Congratulations!

And what’s this to do with achieving the dizzy heights of being a working spiritual medium?

It has everything to do with it.   Spirit and the spirit world are always around us, even when you are feeling somewhat remote or disconnected from them.  Many mediums go through times when they still have to grow as a spirit themselves, even if they are a guru, a teacher, or a person who other people aspire to.  You can’t deny your humanity and just live chatting to spirit people, disconnecting with life and your physical being.  Being a medium doesn’t grant you a pass to the top of the class just because you can talk to dead people, a host of angels, or ascended masters. Ok chatting directly to god might make you a little bit important!

The biggest thing you will learn as being a medium is that despite knowing you are a spirit inside a physical body, you still have to live a physical life and allow human everyday things to exist in your life.  You will never stop developing as a medium and you also never stop growing as a human either.

Through my own long list of facebook friends, I see fellow mediums trying to live life, some living it uncomfortably, some questioning their own spiritual ability, some accepting, some wondering why, some content at where they are in life, some frustrated, others chasing rainbows and believing that their purpose is to be more than they are.  Many believe they are trying to be the spiritual being they are, but really in essence they are being terribly human in their response, not spirit.  You do not need to try to be something which you are already and apart from being human,  you are a soul, and you are spirit.

I often hear many mediums telling me that working for Spirit is the sole reason why they have come to earth, or that they are earth angels and that they are only here to do the Great Spirits or Gods work. Some mediums exhaust themselves every waking moment working for Spirit.  Others meditating for hours and hours a day to strengthen their connection and thinking it is the only way for them to be worthy of the connection.  Week in and week out they attend circles, workshops and the Arthur Findley College to get attain the  level of Spiritual Medium. Pushing themselves harder and harder.  Sadly, through working with Spirit, many spiritual workers become less connected with the physical world, their children and families losing them to communicating with Spirit. A mother, father, daughter, son, best friend not fully present in their lives, not gone to spirit, but almost as much so with the loved ones missing them.  It is truly admirable to be so dedicated, to work so hard and to offer so much of yourself to one thing. I have been there. I have felt it the pull.  I love working with spirit and connecting to that light energy of love. I love the Arthur Findley College, it is a wonderful place and I do recommend any spiritual worker should go there. Working with Spirit is very addictive and once you feel the energy and the connection, you miss it. Also,  working with Spirit feels so much easier than working with human beings with the heavy and darkness that exists in the human world.  Meanwhile Gods beautiful and colourful human world grows grey as you continually live with Spirit.  Is this really what we are supposed to be doing?

It is true the call to work with Spirit can be strong. The Spirit world want ambassadors for spirit to pass on their message of our continuing existence. They are always very pleased to work with us and, if it is something that we chose before we came to the earthly life or chose later to do, they do their best to help us tune in to them.  They rejoice in our remembrance of them and enjoy our questions, our dedication to working with them. But, to stop enjoying living our physical lives, to disconnect ourselves from life, from  our loved ones who lives with us in the physical world?  No, that is not what they expect or what was agreed in the contract of working with them.   They didn’t get you to sign a contract with them in blood. They are not the Devil following you around waving a toasting fork at you shouting that you will rot in hell if you stop working with them for a while and enjoy your life.  You chose it wilfully and equally can unchoose it.

I know this is a matter of what you personally  believe as to what the Spirit world looks like, but consider this.  You arrive in the Spirit world greeted by your guide, your soul group, your family and they ask what your experience of life was.  How did you grow, what did you directly experience, and what did you learn by being human?  Did you grasp every opportunity you were offered? If you believe in soul groups and the contracts you had with them, what would your fellow soul friends say? 

This is not an answer for the human mind to find an opportunity to whip itself - remember god is love, spirit is love….and they would be gentle and loving in their answer. But what would you think, as your higher self, when you are looking and reviewing your life in the Akashic records?

The spiritual influence and our recognition that we are more than what we are strongly pushes us forward to be better as people. It is all over spiritual life to be a better spirit or person.   It is a good thing to be conscious and aware but sometimes the love of spirit makes the human part of us feel unworthy and less, and we strive harder to be what we think we should be rather than being who we are, Human.   In the world of spirit we are part of something beyond our current human comprehension. We resonate to a different vibration that our human physical body cannot spin to and the awareness we feel here is a drop from an ocean too big to be seen.  The unknown, and what we fear, our mind is always trying to logically make sense of, to reassure our subconscious of our being.  It is so terribly human of us.

It is not about stopping being a medium and not trying to be better and improve yourself. But about ensuring that we do not allow the human part of us to push us so hard and so much more than Spirit is actually doing.  When you arrive home in the Spirit world, working with spirit cannot be the reason why you did not experience your human existence to the full.  Our Guides understand our human qualities, are loving and patient and know that we are hungry for knowledge of who we really are, and to be what we can be. They are guiding us through the experience as interactive as they can.  You would not ask a blind man to look and see the beautiful vista, but describe it to him and help him touch it and hope that he enjoys the experience of the connection you have assisted him with.  Even if the blind man, by miracle managed to see it, he would still perhaps not see the same thing as you would be seeing as he is seeing through his eyes, not yours.  As human we are purposely blind to the Spirit world to aide our physical experience. It limits us in the interaction.

So Spirit recognises that there are times which we will not see what they see, not know what they know, and not hear what they hear, and that they can only guide us, and not make our life their journey or experience.  What we feel is totally down to us, and they are guided by us in that connection. They want us to excel at being human, and they have agreed to be with us every step of the way to encourage us through our journey in the physical world to grasp the experience of life.  They also have to allow us to interact with our experience in our own way, allow our free will to take us on the journey of our lives, allowing us to fly in any direction we want to gain the biggest experience to bring home to the spirit world.  In the many moments of now that they have loved and worked with us, even when we were unaware of spirit, they always have known and seen the bigger picture.  They do not expect us to be more than who we are as they already know and love us as whom and what we are. It’s just us human’s who don’t. It is all part of being human and our development.  

Yes, not everyone will be aware of Spirit in their human life time, but that does not make them less, just a choice that has been made to hear a different drum and to dance to a different tune.  It doesn’t make them less capable than us, and can even sometime make them even more connected to both spirit and the physical world more than us, as spirit is still influencing and working with them.  Truly being a medium does not lift you to the level of a god above other humans!

The beauty of being a medium is that we learn that we can rely on the fact that Spirit guides and helps us, as that awareness of the two-way link we have always gives us the opportunity of being able to ask for their view. But, however, they will not, and cannot, give us the answers that we need to grow as human and spirit, but will always facilitate to help us explore and expand our understanding and knowledge.

Recently, in my quiet connection with Spirit, they helped me understand certain aspects I was questioning in my recent life challenges.  It is not a point of sympathy, and I am not asking for a chorus of wailing (but thank you anyway if you are so inclined) but we all have to go through the cycle of life with our parents. It is the way of nature being born to physically die.  Death knocks on our door in many ways, and sometimes it can be a cruel slow process of painful watching and waiting of what you know is inevitable, and when any person is face with their mortality or mortality of their loved ones, even a talking to dead people worker, the magic can fall out of life and the stress of living volume button gets turned up a few notches. It has been that type of year. It is normal though.  Whilst living my human experience, I recognised that I needed some assistance through it and so asked for it.  First it came through a fabulous lady called Julia, who shared some lovely ways of thinking and discussions about universal law. And secondly, through a book arriving in my space “Butterflies are free to fly” by Stephan Davis. (free on kindle download through Amazon).

After talking with Julia, and me being blonde with several brain cells on a permanent holiday, I decided to expand my knowledge on the universal laws, not just law of attraction, but the real scientific view against the spiritual view.  As usual my lovely spirit guides (through my best friend Google) led me to this book which for a while did rock my world quite profoundly, so much so that I shared it with some of spiritual best friends.

So what is so great about this book, apart from the big blue butterfly on its cover? It does tell you it is a very radical book in its thought processes. The first thing I will say is that the book is written by a guy who used to be highly active in the scientologist movement.  However, it is an interesting book and makes good use of metaphor and analogies to explain it's point.  It specifically highlights that we humans live reality to that we can only directly see and what is in our experience and perception of it. Plato, as well as having a mention, would have loved it.  I won’t be a plot spoiler, as I think it is a book everyone should read as it is has many truths, much wisdom, and other points to share that will help add colour to anyone’s thought processes and knowledge, even if they throw out the way of thinking.  The book has a point of view some would argue against and that may even bring some spiritual warriors to draw passionate “S” words at dawn, particularly as it challenges spiritual thinking.

For me, though, it reminded me why I thought the way I did, and of the strong belief I have always had since a young child.  It made me think and consider many points of my belief. It rang question after question in my heart, as I could not argue with some of the mind blowing elements of wisdom and truth in some of his view points. It was clear, though, that his much of his belief was deeply ground in his own personal experience, with elements which I could not resonate with because of how and what I believe.  There were several interesting viewpoints about our lives being governed by an “Infinite one”, and for those who have read it, or do intend to read it, I still like to refer to my infinite one as being my higher self….and I couldn’t resist and went through the door!  Whether it was the one intended is another point altogether!

The one big point which shouted out of the book was that life is there for us to experience, and most of all, that we should enjoy the experience.  We may all seek a purpose, but in truth our purpose is to experience life and to “feel” it to the very core of our soul, higher self, or as in the book, infinite one.  What that experience is, I think, is for us to choose…and perhaps guided by our higher self or infinite one to the experience it directs.  Even when life is uncomfortable, like this last year has been for me, I recognise I have chosen it to be that way somewhere along the line by how I have interacted with it.   I can fight it, challenge it, but it will still make it as uncomfortable as it can be as I am resisting the experience and it will continue to be that way whilst I resist.  After having what seems a very long year, the saying is true that what you resist persists.  

So there you are, the Devil is merrily dancing, teasing and prodding you with his fork, and because he is a little sadistic little so and so, he doesn’t have it in his ability to go away politely when you keep telling him you are not enjoying the experience. He though is gleefully ignoring you as he is enjoying every second of his experience of watching you squirm uncomfortably and shaking in your boots, providing him with the emotion and drama he is hungrily looking for.  He is more likely going to dance and jump around you revelling in your fear and discomfort with the hope and anticipation of you giving him more. He could be in for a surprise, as the moment you accept and smile back accepting the experience of him dancing, it becomes no fun and no longer is he getting the emotion and drama he was being fed by you, as you are no longer resisting but engaging in and enjoying the experience. Suddenly the pain and prodding you were experiencing stops.

Some years ago during my recruitment agency work, there was a lady who I had to go and discuss business with.  She was very professional, and cheerful lady, but I couldn’t help noticing that she had a habit of saying thank you before speaking back, or just generally sliding it in the conversation in response to my comments.  At the time I thought it strange, but I left feeling that I had missed some important point, as well thinking that I had met a very enlightened soul that day. 

My recent experience through the book and my friend Julia is that life is for feeling and enjoying. Every experience you go though is to be appreciated, be it negative or positive. It’s not about being grateful and constantly saying thank you, but appreciating every experience that comes into your space by acknowledging your feeling of it and the growth it is trying to bring. 

Ok, you may think it strange, but give it a go – just beware of the too many loud thank you’s; people may think it’s a tick.

In that appreciation and acknowledgment of it, you can connect to an experience you wish to enjoy, rather than existing in an experience you do not.  Saying thank you, or just appreciating the experience, allows acceptance (a mental yes) to the awareness of truth to resonate and interact with you about the experience.  It brings learning, nullifies any resistance, and brings the opportunity of conscious change to your experience.
So now when I am having a challenging moment, I try to remember that I am experiencing life I have chosen, and say thank you.  Whether it is to my higher self, my guides or infinite one, as in the book, is immaterial.  Those who read the book may appreciate the viewpoint even more though.  

Spirit always like to show they have a hand in things – and in confirmation of this, I now strangely work for an organisation called infinite – and weirdly for a week or two I had to daily type a password of “infinite1” to log into a local network.  It still baffles me that I do that, but synchronicity and my spirit guides are truly amazing…and I thank them for the experience!

Another important point of wisdom, that my lovely friend Julia gave was to remind me that everyone has the right to be an individual source of the divine, be their own path, their own drama.  It is their life, their reality, their experience…and no one is either right, or wrong, despite what we have always been told as children.  Both right and wrong exist in the universe, and when you make a right, then the natural law of polarity means that it’s polar opposite of wrong always exists somewhere in the situation, whether it is someone feeling it or being it, and vice versa with wrong and right.  It is like a coin, one side facing up, and other down, and seeing the facing up side as the right side.  You only need to reverse it, and the other side now is the right side where in reality they both exist and it is always your perception of it which makes it right or wrong.  By recognition of both sides and accepting that they both exist, you become neither up nor down, right or wrong, but neutral.

Knowledge and hindsight is a wonderful thing though and I can see when I look back as to how many times I have fought and resisted this past year, what my heart already knew. Although the uncomfortable journey I have been experiencing this past year has been as a result of my own reaction to loved ones own fight with their experience of life and health challenges, I appreciate more now  that the resistance I gave to accepting the experience was futile and unproductive, as it is like trying to stop the world from turning round.  I see now how my humanity shouting at me protesting at its reality, and my spiritual connection trying to remind me of the bigger picture.

You cannot avoid being human. It is what you physically are. By nature humans measures the world in polarity. We are emotionally motivated by feeling ok, and not ok, right and wrong, Yes or No, and the internal battle which can be created by the polarity can affect our daily lives and our decisions. Living up to our own expectations, perceived other’s people’s expectations and how we interact with our life time experiences is what makes our reality and our final experience.   Often it can be put upon us like a cloak we believe we should wear, forgetting that it may not be ours to put on, as we have in truth just allowed ourselves to get dragged into a moment of dressing up in somebody else’s clothes, and then trying to look good in it and feeling unhappy as a result.  The point is, even unconsciously, you made the choice of wearing the cloak…and that goes for every experience you have had – you made the choice to be there.  We are all supporting actors in the drama of other people’s lives, and so are they when we are the lead.  Often, entering into others experiences and making their drama our drama, and even through the love of Spirit we can adopt the worlds drama as our own.  If you are not enjoying it, resisting the experience, then how about turning it on its head, like the coin? Sometimes you have to take consciously take off the cloak and look in the wardrobe for the one you want to wear. 

You might be in someone else’s wardrobe but you don’t have to put their cloak on.  You can appreciate it without entering into the direct experience of feeling it.  It is their right to be in their own experience, it is their reality, made by their own interaction with their experience.  A good question to ask when you think you may have wandered into someone else’s experience is this my truth?  If you feel your heart tightening or constricting, or some resistance to the idea – it is clearly telling you that something is amiss and perhaps it is not what you should be doing.

As you develop as a medium, you will have many moments when you are reminded that you are human. To work well with the spirit world, it is important to ensure there is the balance of the physical and spiritual in your life.  We are all Alice’s in Wonderland. Sometimes you may tip too much one way, and fall down the hole and find yourself sitting at the Mad Hatter’s tea party or in front of the Queen of hearts.  It is normal and natural to experience this life and when you are there don’t resist it, feel the experience you are in. Don’t try to make yourself fit in a box that is not designed for you. Love working with Spirit, and by all means acquire new knowledge, grow spiritually.  But don’t work so hard to just be, when the only thing you need to be in this life is a happy you.  This is the life you chose and are still choosing.

So be how you really are. Enter into and engage with the experience of living, feel your life, feel the world around you.  Love being human and spirit on a journey as one sharing an amazing experience.  

Saturday, 18 May 2013

Inspiration - tapping into the universe

How do you feel when you are inspired...to write, to draw, to sings, to create?
Did you know  you were tapping into the universal energy?
Since the days I learnt that I could put pen to paper I have always written.  Poetry, short story's, articles...even my own version of mills and boon.  My eleven year old version of a steamy romance, which was possibly the biblical version of fifty shades of grey, still kept school mates gasping for the next edition. Although it was immaturely and naively written, it captured me and my friends. I would hungrily sit for hours writing in a school exercise book, churning chapter after chapter out - without a typewriter or a computer in sight, and no hope of a publisher. but my audience loved it.    For me it was a way of expressing myself and putting my thoughts in order, and had started mainly for my own enjoyment.   At that point I was writing because it tumbled out of me spurred on by emotional responses to the world around me. I didn't know that i was slowly tapping into something bigger than me.
I look back at my earlier writing and see my childhood and my teenager angst... the woes and the joys, and see the glimpses of the person I was becoming, and growing to be. Although I did not put words to my spiritual awareness at that time, the inate awareness of being connected to some thing larger than myself was huge and quietly sat as a back bone in practically everything I wrote.  Now I see so much more and the skills I was honing.
So why talk about inspiration now?  Those who are connected to my Facebook are used to my weird statuses, the moments when I suddenly  have the urge for words to fall out of my head and I put up something reflective and, to some, diatribe about life. Some of my Facebook friends may have hidden my statuses because suddenly I am sprouting weird stuff, others though put messages of resonation, and in that moment i know that i have done the job I was supposed to do, even if I look at my status myself and think bloody hell what are you on girl!
It is inspiration. But when you feel that energy and allow that energy to flow, something happens deep inside you, and you then open up to the same energy that created this world...and if you think it in a wider context, the universe...and the divine energy of creation.
Yep god was clearly having an inspirational moment when he created me, let alone the world, and the universe!
The beauty about inspiration is that you don't need to put a religion on it or connect it to him upstairs, God, Allah, or any of his other personalities.  You only have to accept that it's there and that you can do wonderful things with it.  When we create we are connecting to something which communicates back at us, feeds our soul, rewards us with something physically we can see, and bring to life.  We are all mini gods and by using this energy we create our world and our universe.
But okay, according to my Talent Dynamics profile I am a creator, and have dynamo energy, and have my head in the clouds, and inspiration is natural to me. But that is a natural choice for me, but everyone can be inspired, but in their own way.
The other day I was attending a meeting, and as a medium who is now used to opening and connecting to the energy around me. I was listening to a medium give a message and then  suddenly words started jumping in my head that surprised me as it was such a different format than I was used to. As they spun round like a miniature sand storm in my head, I had to immediately write them the moment the meeting ended. My dear friend waiting patiently as I urgently and frantically wrote in his car on my phone, and straight on to Facebook..
"...And the child flew merrily with out fear cross the sky. The adult watched in awe and wonder and said I wish I could do that.The child stopped surprised, but you taught me, did you forget how to fly? The adult remembered for a moment. I grew up, and stopped living intuitively where conformity became my cage. My wings got weighed down by the sadness of not flying. The child said, follow me as I can fly! ... "
When I eventually read what I wrote, I thought crikey who have i tapped into...Peter Pan? Tinkerbell?  Wendy.  The comments I got clearly stirred something within the readers. Whilst I thought it an unusual status. some thought it beautiful.
As my husband would say, you've been busy haven't you...but for me I am used to it, know that something more is at work and that I write now just for more just me. Even though I still feel like Alice in wonderland when I eventually see what I have written, I know, especially now after the above, that I only just have to connect and something amazing will happen.
I am sure everyone has their thoughts to what is occurring, but it does not matter what I am connecting to whether it is my head, my higherself, my ego, a guide,  wordsworth,  Tinkerbell, universal energy,  or even god. Along as it is good, as long as I have the good honest intention when I allow myself to become inspired, something amazing may happen. I now recognise that energy and allow it to happen, without fear, I open myself up to the inspiration whether it is triggered by a beautiful sunset, a piece of music, a person, a story or a feeling...and allows  the answer from the universe to flow.
I am not special, or particularly gifted.  Inspiration is something we all have...all capable of allowing for ourselves.
As in the words written above, and as I did too as a child,  children are inspired so naturally where many adults forget, but still encourage their children to be inspired. So looks to your children, look to you as a child. What inspires you?
So come and join me in the clouds...
Allow yourself to fly and connect to the energy of the universe.